Galentine’s Day

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(pictured above with me: Emma B)

In the wise words of one talented, insightful Leslie Knope, Galentine’s Day, February 13th, is only the best day of the year. No, not Valentine’s Day. That “holiday” is solely reserved for the consumerist exploitation of googly-eyed, happily in love couples. (Don’t worry, I’m not still incredibly salty about going 17 years and strong with no Valentine.) But Galentine’s Day: the day of the single lady. This year I’ve decided to save myself the trouble of trying to find V-day plans with my single girlfriends and instead have planned a nice little Galentine’s Day fiesta. (Did I really just say fiesta? I’m not backspacing.) I’ve listed my G-day itinerary below, hopefully it’ll serve as inspo for you as well:

Sunday, February 13th

10:30 AM: Relatively ambitious wake-up time. This probably won’t happen.

12:00 PM: More practical wake-up time. Please do not confuse wake-up time with get-out-of-bed time. Two completely different tasks.

1:30 PM: Drag butt out of bed. Attempt to nail eyeliner wing once. Attempt second time. Eventually give up and accept wing how it is.

2:30 PM: Meet the girls at the movie theater for How To Be Single. Laugh at how ridiculously funny Leslie Mann, Dakota Johnson, Rebel Wilson and Alison Brie have to be together. Cry internally a bit. Eat lots of overly-priced comfort food, since you’ve got no one else to spend your money on.

5:00 PM: Target run for more food. Popcorn, chips, cookies, baking supplies, CHEESECAKE, pizza, more cookies (make sure you get the V-day decorated soft cookies, so you can constantly remind yourself that you’re still single.)

5:45 PM: Sing obnoxiously loud on car ride home. Only artists appropriate for jamming: old-school JBiebs, heart-wrenching Sam Smith, ‘Yonce, throwback Adele, & aggressive rap.

6:10 PM: Commence the wining (sparkling cider, lol), dining (main course: pizza), & more whining (anything and everything is fair game for complaining and/or roasting).

10:00 PM: Pop in a cheesy rom-com. Why not transition from complaining to over-correcting.

12:00 AM: Fall asleep knowing you don’t have to do this again until next Feb. rolls around.

No, in all seriousness though. More power to you single ladies (and gents). Whether you want to be single or not, you are. Embrace it, use it to your advantage! It’s just a period of your life meant to be focused on other things. If you’re committed, happy V-day. Spoil your loved one, you’re lucky to have them. But always remember the real reason for the season: a perfect excuse for consuming unethical amounts of chocolate without anyone having the right to judge you. Cheers.

xo, TSJ

 

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